Sunday, January 2, 2011
I have one just like you
I was browsing some of the social networking sites I have joined and got a little irritated. It may just be me but I didn't know there existed communities of moms who have sects they are joined in. What I mean by that is.....I had never heard of moms being put against each other because of the choice they make in parenting. I'm sure this has been touched on by many blogger before my newbie behind ever thought about blogging. I have seem the formula feeding moms verses the breastfeeding moms.....the cloth diaper moms verses the disposable diaper moms......the yes I circumcision moms verses the HELL NO non circumcising moms.....the pierce the girls ears moms verses the don't pierce the girls ears mom......the vaccinating moms verses the non vaccinating moms.....gay verses straight.....the stay at home moms verses the partime/fulltime working moms....I'm sure Ive forgot some "verses" but you get the idea. What promoted this post was the down right nastiness that can come from disagreeing about any of the above on various sites. And then it hit my front door. In the last 2 months I received a few mean emails about me having formula feed Muffin and breastfeeding. They stated they don't see how I was hired to be a Breastfeeding Peer Counselor for WIC and I'm fake. At first I was pissed and going to go off but maturity won out. Which is rare when you insult me. Hey I'm a work in progress. But anyway I deleted the emails and realized that what they said was there OPINION. A opinion is a voice we all have and are allowed to voice and share. Freedom of speech right?...right. However I am a believer in you get more flies with honey than with vinegar. Meaning, If you approach a subject you either disagree with or agree with its OKAY to be feel passionate about how you feel and want to share with the world and possibly change peoples minds about certain subjects but you CAN NOT BELITTLE AND NAME CALL AND DEGRADE the other person for believing what they feel whether it agrees with you or not. That shit is not cool. I don't ever try to MAKE someone believe what I feel just cause I feel my way is correct. I'm allowed to make my own informed decision about any subject matter I want to. Majority rule don't move me....what the majority believe is not always what I believe. Oh well...that's me and how I feel. I'm just saying I think you tear moms down when this happens and as a mom myself I think moms online should feel okay with stating there opinion without being verbally harassed. Seriously the way I have seen some speaking to other moms..(smh)..I just think that if it were in person the "tone" would be a whole lot softer. I guess seeing as the Internet is the choice for verbal bullying people like that will continue to hide behind a screen. Maybe 2011 will show a change.
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You are so right about this! I've noticed it, too. But it makes me wonder...
ReplyDeleteIn real life, I don't seem to encounter this type of chasm between moms. Perhaps it exists, it's just that people aren't as confrontational in person. And as you say, they are more "tone" friendly.
But being anonymous on the computer with zero accountability & no consequences, people tend to be as rude as they want. Sad. We really should support each other as mothers & offer words of encouragement rather than judgement & hostility. Differing opinions aside...we still deal with many of the same challenges.
Why tear each other down? Here's hoping that people are kinder to each other!
@The Mommy I agree 100% with you. The internet allows people to "wear" many faces. For me I will continue to be fair to everyone and show respect. Its so much fun & easier being kind.
ReplyDeleteI completely agree with you. Unfortunately, a lot of bullies hide behind their cutesy online personas.
ReplyDelete@30ish Mama Yes very unfortunate...It actually hurt my feeling a lil being called fake cause my baby was not exclusively breastfeed and yet I'm a breastfeeding peer counselor..however these thing were said to thru a bogus email. (Coward!) But I have nary a moment to recall since being in social networks getting into with any moms. I've not seen eye to call with some mom but never a verbal drag out...yet some seeked me out and was nasty to me in emails. And I have no idea who it was. More likely its someone I socialize virtually with all the times. Who knows. Oh well I say. I can't make anyone like me, and above all I don't kiss ass just to have online friends. :-) Hopefully 2011 brings about a change amoungst us moms.
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